Fear of Loss – It’s Just a Story

Most of what I know about success I learned from my clients, those that succeeded and those that have not.  This story is about how thoughts are creative especially when they stimulate our fears.  We have control – when we pay attention and clear our thinking.

Kathy is a consultant.  She has one very big contract that keeps her busy most of the time though she has other clients as well.   Every now and then she goes into fear that if she looses this primary client it will devastate her.  As with any business we know not to rely on one or two contracts though many successful businesses have done just that for years.  The intuitive point in this story is Kathy has a fear (picture) in her mind (space) that is at her core.  She has expressed several times that she wants to get of  fear of not having the money she needs and wants.

As an intuitive I have observed that we are always getting our goals.  Kathy has declared that one of her goals is to get out of fear.  Once we have a goal our world changes in ways that help us achieve that goal.  Often that means experiencing what we fear so that we can get out of it.   Watching Kathy intuitively I saw her creating ways to re-stimulate her fear of losing a client not because she wanted this to happen but so that she could use the opportunity to get out of fear.

Intuitively I watched this fear picture move to the surface (of her space) and experiences begin to happen.  The first was Mandy, who taught her and mentored her for years to become a consultant, called to say that she lost her biggest client and now was in serious financial straits.  This was big for Kathy.  If it could happen to Mandy then it could happen to her.  The person who was the expert just created what Kathy feared the most.  I cautioned Kathy to pay close attention to her reaction and not to go into sympathy because in doing do she brings her mentors problem into her space where is could easily manifest for her as well.  I suggested that she consider Mandy as  her teacher in a new way.   Learn by looking intuitively and seeing what caused Mandy to create this and see if Kathy has a similar concept so that she could clear this thought.

The next experience was with one of executives who works for her largest client.  He told her the new CFO wanted to cut Kathy’s contract in half.  Panic!  She immediately believed it was true. I warned Kathy not to place her attention on that thought knowing that whatever thought you place your attention on will manifest.  It does not matter whether it is something that you want or something that you fear.  Kathy did not have to take that communication as her reality.

Finally, her best friend called to say that her husband’s pay was cut 60% and they were doomed.  When Kathy told me these  three  scenarios one after another I began to laugh and asked Kathy if she could see that there was no coincidence here.  She has a choice.  She could match the pictures and see all of this happening to her – her greatest fear – and it would or she could use this opportunity to get her goal to get out of fear by clearing her thinking.  Again I cautioned against dwelling on these stories or going into sympathy.

At the end of her session Kathy spent time meditating on seeing clearly her vision of success, releasing her fear and clearing her thinking.  Kathy knows that her vision of success does not depend on this client.  That it can manifest in a number of ways.  However, Kathy did not want to lose her client so we meditated on her having a conversation with the new CFO and visualized how she would like that conversation to go.

Kathy reported back that despite all her fears the conversation with the CFO went very well.  She continues to check herself when she goes into fear before her thinking  distorts her reality.

Be aware of your thinking.  It’s just your story.

Best wishes on your success,  Kay

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Staying on Track with Your Goals for the Year

  It paid off to trust my intuition yesterday when I gave a presentation to a group of women business owners.  The topic of the presentation was “Staying on Track with Your Goals for the Year”.  It was the end of the first quarter, an important marker for businesses to evaluate how they are doing in achieving the goals for the year.  This is something you want to know early though many businesses neglect to take advantage of opportunity and regret it later. When you take the time now to assess where you are you can make adjustments, get unstuck and move forward to meet your goals.

Goals Not Being Met

As an intuitive business consultant I know that progress in achieving our goals is not always logical.  Some things move along nicely, one step leads to another.  Other goals languish on our strategic plan, list of targets or goals we have established.  I would guess that some of these have been on our list year after year. From my perspective, if there were a logical solution to unmet goals they would have been accomplished by now.  Sometimes what gets in the way of our goals can be determined more from an intuitive perspective than analyzing the problem.  This is where I started with this group of business owners and this is the approach I use with all of my clients.  Use your intuition.  Stop thinking and see clearly.

Vision of Success

I had them begin by revisiting their  vision of success.  The most successful people in any field are those who have the strongest vision.  I find that we are good at setting goals but goals absent a vision are just a lot of hard work.  So I had them write their vision of success.  Some knew it and felt good writing it down.  Others had never looked at their business in this way.  They had a business plan and a business model that guided their decisions but not a vision.

Now Determine if the Goals Fit the Vision

Once you have a clear vision of success then everything else falls into place. This is not logical but it is very intuitive.  With a clear vision, look at your goals to see if they now fit to carry out your vision.  If not then change them now before you get to far into the year.

A vision is different from a thought or a plan.  Vision is something you see in your mind’s eye.  You know and see what success is for you.  It is an intuitive ability to know for certain.    The best way I know to do this is in meditation.  Meditation is simply quieting the body and clearing the mind so that you can open to more awareness and to see more clearly.

Exercise: Try this for yourself.

  • Sit in a comfortable and quiet place.
  • Begin to quiet the body.  Take a deep breath and release all the tension and energy you are holding in your body.  Relax.
  • Now clear your mind.  Stop thinking and instead just be aware of yourself.
  • Be present in the moment.  Imagine calling your energy and attention back from where ever it is outside you.  Have all your attention right here in this moment.  Notice yourself and your immediate surroundings.
  • With your eyes closed imagine a red rose.  This keeps you from thinking and opens your intuition using your mind’s eye.
  • Meditate on this rose as you ask what is your vision of success.  Don’t think just imagine what success is to you.  Get to know this for yourself. Imagine what it looks like, feels like, etc.  It may not be what you think it is for you. Take a deep breath and let go of others ideas of success, “you should”, ego, etc.

Meditate

It often takes several meditations to get clear enough so say that is it.  That’s my vision of success.  It feels right.

My surprise was how eager the business owners embraced this exercise and the insight each person got from their meditation.  I expected them to roll their eyes and want something logical, linear and practical.  That approach works too but when it doesn’t access the other side of your brain.  Be intuitive.

Meditation is essential.  We all need time to stop clear our space and our thinking so that we regain our perspective otherwise we make the wrong decision, don’t see clearly and get off track of where we want to be.  Meditate.

Next Step: Get your staff to buy into your vision.  Watch for this on another blog.

Best wishes on your success,

Kay

More information on meditation

Consultation achieving your vision of success

Getting decisions right

The most common reason people call for a consultation is they have a decision to make and they want to get it right.  We all want to be certain about the decisions we make but is not always what happens.   Neurologist Robert Burton believes our brains often manufacture a sense of certainty that we are right whether that is the case or not.  This happens because the brain has the ability to create a feeling of being right even when we are drastically wrong.  That is scary and we have all had this happen to us.  How often have your said or heard, “What was I thinking?”  I often tease that the brain has a mind of its own and makes up incredible stories that simply are not true.

From an intuitive perspective it is easy to be a better decision maker. When people call about making a decision they say:

  • I feel one-way one day and the opposite the other.
  • I can’t decide.
  • I have three thoroughly logical decisions and I can argue each of them equally.
  • I want to feel absolutely certainty about this decision.
  • I can’t find a good decision. I don’t like any of my options.
  • I have made a decision but it doesn’t feel right.
  • All the facts say I should decide this way but my intuition tells me otherwise.

Is this a decision you need to make?

Would it surprise you if I said, “Most times there is no decision to be made”? Or that decision making is overrated. Knowing when not to make a decision is just as important as making the right decision. For example, Should I quit my job?  Should I move?  Should I hire or fire Suzie?  When I hear a question like this I know the person is not ready to make a decision OR they are asking the wrong question.

When someone has a decision they are struggling with my question is always the same.  What is your goal or the vision you have for your company?  That is always the starting point.  If you don’t answer that question first then you are building a Winchester Mystery House of decisions and not a successful business.

Decision making from an intuitive perspective

When we have a clear vision of our success and a plan to get there we barely realize the decisions that we are making all day long.  We gather the facts and information and if it supports our goal then we make a decision without a second thought.  You don’t call me.  Everything is moving, as it should.

When decision-making is difficult

When we get out of sync with our vision, lose our perspective or someone places a demand, their energy or a problem in our space  suddenly we feel like we have a difficult decision to make.  When you hear yourself say, “Should I…..? you know you have lost your perspective so it is time to stop and not make a decision from that space.

What gets in the way of having perspective?

When we are overwhelmed by energy in our space, cannot see straight or think clearly we are not in the space to make a decision.  So what can  affect our ability to see or think clearly?

  • Other’s energy or concepts in our space.
    • What others want you to decide
    • Others reactions to what you decide
    • People who have investment (or energy) in your decisions
  • Ego: Our ego can easily get in the way of making a decision that helps meet our goals
  • Past experiences, memories, energy or thoughts clouding our perspective
  • Our fears or emotions
  • Resistance to change
  • Wanting to stay in our comfort zone
  • Wanting to please someone or everyone.

Knowing what affects your decision-making ability makes you a better decision maker. If does not feel right then step back, get more information, find other choices or realize its not a decision you need to make. Having perspective means seeing clearing and being able to step back and look from a neutral place. Making good decisions means being aware of your vision and what is affecting you in the moment.

Recognizing when you have lost your space (perspective)?

You have lost your space and your perspective when:

  • When you feel pushed to make a decision.
  • When you feel yourself reacting to someone or something or everyone and everything.
  • When you hear yourself say, “I should…” This is always a red flag that we have lost our perspective.
  • Can’t decide. Arguing one-side then the other. Or keep changing your mind.

How to Make Good Decisions

Here is an intuitive approach to making better decisions. Make sure you have a clear and neutral perspective when making a decision.  If it seem difficult even after having all the information that you need then stop thinking.

Stop Thinking: If the decision was logical based on available information then you would have already made the decision without effort.  So the answer cannot be found in logically. Robert Burton, a neurologist, shows studies that indicate our thinking can be dead wrong. Another study showed the more we think about something the more inaccurate we can become.

Find your space/Regain your perspective: Take the time to meditate.  Everyone whines about this but this is the best way to regain your perspective. How are you doing? What is on your mind? Who’s in your space? Are you clear thinking and in a space of neutrality?

Take the time to be clear about your goals or vision of success. Ask, “Will this decision  help me meet my goals?” If the answer is “No” then whose question is it or whose problem are you solving?

Intuitive Exercise

  • Find a quiet and comfortable place to close your eyes
  • Take a deep breath and begin to bring all of your attention on yourself
  • Calm your body and clear your mind
  • Be grounded and centered
  • Imagine (do not think) the decision you are about to make
  • Meditate on one decision versus another.  Use your intuition to begin to clear your thinking
  • Let go of others’ energy in your space about this decision
  • Take deep breaths and release
  • Once you are calm and quiet and you feel clear then ask yourself what is the right decision (even if it makes you uncomfortable in some way)
  • Listen to your first thought because the thoughts after that will be the mind arguing with you

Best wishes on your success, Kay

Success with Grace

     I would not be surprised if you are not drawn to this theme or even relate to it.  Success as we know it and have seen is not graceful.  It is hard work . At times it is brutal .  So many tie their energy in knots as a way of creating success.  This is not the only way to create success but it is the way we have been taught and programmed and so our automatic response can create effort, stress, problems, conflicts, etc.

There is another way.  What is Success with Grace?   Well, we all know what success means to us and for each of us this will be different.  Grace is the energy level we are being as we create our success.  As an intuitive I see the energy of grace as energy moving in body, mind and spirit.   Now some of you have changed to another link but for those of you who are still reading there may be an answer here for you.

Maybe the idea of body, mind and spirit does not fit with the concept of business or success then again maybe it does.  The challenge is to take the time to find the vibration of grace for yourself.  It may take quiet time (meditation) to become aware.   As a starting point grace is the state of being at ease and in neutrality.   Being at the vibration of grace makes it easy to have perspective, make the right decision, and see your vision clearly.

Approaching your work from the vibration of grace does not make your work life perfect but it does change how you react and handle demands, expectations,  communication, problems, etc.

How do you know when you are working from the vibration of grace?  You are clear-headed, have a level of neutrality to what is going on in your work or business, have the ability to focus on your vision and are non-reactive.

Carol

Carol is one of my clients who has a clear vision of her success as an investment broker, is very smart and knows her industry well.  She is struggling to succeed.  When I look intuitively I see her energy “tied in knots”.  Carol finds it hard to be neutral in body, mind and spirit all at once.  She is most neutral spirituality. Her body and her mind are reactive.  For example, you could say that she flies off the handle (body and mind).

 Fred

Fred, a successful pastry chef, is looking to reduce the stress in his work life.  He is what I refer to as a healer.  Fred feels the need to respond to everyone’s displeasure, which causes him to be reactive.  When I look intuitively, I see that Fred has grace (ease and neutrality) in the mind and spirit parts of him.   His body is not neutral to those around him.   He is looking to find the vibration of grace in his body.

Exercise

Now back to you.  Take a moment without thinking.  Notice with your eyes closed what happens for you in your work?  Are you aware of how you approach your work?

  • Do you feel like you see clearly and have perspective (spirit – your intuitive side)?
  • Are you able to clear your thinking and have perspective (mind – getting out of old thoughts in your head)?
  • Are you calm with emotions in check (body – no tension)?

Meditation

Finding the vibration of grace takes your attention, as most of us were not taught how to be there.  Try this meditation.  This could take five minutes or an hour.  Take time for each step.

  • Sit in a quiet and comfortable place
  • Close your eyes and take deep breaths to release the tension in your body
  • Be grounded and centered – behind eyes in center of head
  • Begin to quiet the body and clear your mind –deep breaths and releasing
  • Place your attention on yourself and notice how you are doing.
    • Try not to think rather notice and be aware
    • Meditate on the vibration of grace for you
      • Imagine ease in your mind – release your thoughts
      • Imagine ease in your body – release the tension and emotions
      • Imagine ease in your spirit – hear  your inner voice
      • Take deep breaths and release until you experience the vibration of grace as you know it at this moment (ease, neutrality, tension free)

The next step is to bring this awareness into your life.  When you are at work take a moment to notice if you are at the vibration of grace or something else.  The more you do this the more you will grow in your understanding of your vibration of grace.

Notice how this changes how you experience yourself (body, mind and spirit) and your work.

Best wishes on your success,  Kay

Learn Meditation

Business Success: How do you want to be?

One of my clients, Sarah, called me last week because she was suddenly aware of how she was being with others: staff, colleagues, clients, etc.   She became aware when a long time client dropped her company suddenly and for no clear reason.

In hindsight, she realized that she had lost sight of herself.  The stresses of her life and work were being felt by all those around her.   She was not being herself.  She was up tight and people were avoiding her.

It is possible to run a successful business without self-awareness.  Many successful business owners have all their attention on their success and are succeeding without self-awareness.   The culture of business is changing.  Men and women see creating a successful business as part of who they are and what they are creating in their lives.  They are doing what they enjoy.  Enjoy what they are doing and want to keep it that way so when things get out of whack they want to know why.

Back to Sarah.  Your clients, staff, colleagues, etc. are intuitive.  They pick up on your energy.  It affects them because you are the captain of the ship.   Knowing how they are experiencing you begins with self-awareness.  What are you being today?  What is on your mind?  What energy are others experiencing?  Is this helping get the reactions that you want and meet the goals you have set?

Intuitive Exercise

  • Take time each day to meditate (Close your eyes and pay attention to yourself.  Quiet the body and clear the mind.)
  • Notice how you are doing.
  • What is on your mind?
  • Release whatever you are holding onto: a conversation, a disappointment, etc. so that you are in the moment.
  • Decide how you would like to be in your work, your personal life, etc.
  • How do you want others to experience you?
  • Now change your space to that.  Change your energy.  Release.  Raise your vibration.
  • Imagine (see in your mind’s eye) how you to be.

When you are feeling like yourself again then you are ready.  You and others will experience the difference.

Best wishes on your success,

Kay

What does your audience receive?

As business owners and professionals we are often in the position of giving a presentation.  This might be to pitch our company to a prospective client, a presentation to a group on our area of expertise, etc.   Regardless of the presentation or the purpose it could make us or break us.  It is hard to erase others memory of their experience so let’s get it right in the first place.

There are many resources giving advice and tips on preparing the visuals the content then giving the presentation.  Here is one article I found interesting.  FastCompany.

There is another very important aspect that is often overlooked.  How and what you present is one consideration but more importantly what does your audience receive and perceive?   How is your space?  What do others see intuitively when they watch you speak?  What do they “pick up” about you?   Everyone is intuitive whether they are conscious of it or not and so they react to you, your energy and whatever is going on in your space when you give a presentation.

I have attended presentations with my clients to observe and give feedback.   In one case, I observed my client completely alienate his potential clients because of the energy in his space when he pitched his company.   Conversely I have observed another client completely sell a potential client on giving him a chance  to show his ability to produce.

The key is for you to know what is going on in your space before you give a presentation and change your space as needed to present not only the material but yourself, your space and your energy in a way that helps you meet your goal.

Intuitive Exercise

  1. Take time to meditate well ahead of your presentation and just before your presentation.  Do this as often as needed to clear your space.
  2. Sit quietly with your eyes closed.   If you know how, be grounded, centered and in present time.
  3. Imagine a symbol of a rose in your mind’s eye.  This helps you to stop thinking. This rose will represent the presentation.
  4. Now meditate on the presentation.  Notice how you feel about it, your thoughts, emotions, fears, etc.  Be self-aware.  Your audience picks up on these same things so know where you are.
  5. Begin to release or let go of any thoughts, emotions, concepts, etc. that invalidate or get in the way of your goal for your presentation.
  6. Know your goal for the presentation.  What outcome do you want?
  7. Now imagine how you want to be during the presentation, imagine how it will go, how you will present yourself, how you will feel, etc.  What do you want others to see, feel, react, etc.  Keep imagining until you can see it clearly in your mind’s eye.  You may have to do this several times before your presentation.
  8. When you can see it in your mind’s eye then you are ready.
  9. Be sure to do this just prior to your presentation.  Shaking off other unrelated distractions or energy so that you and your energy are completely set and focused as you imagine it.

Best wishes on your success,  Kay

Do You Believe in Miracles? I Count on Them!

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as if everything is.”
– Albert Einstein

Do you believe in miracles?  I count on them!  A miracle is typically considered something that comes out of the blue and beyond our control.  From an intuitive perspective that is inaccurate.

As an intuitive I see a miracle as something we have envisioned, did not know how to manifest at the precise time and place of our choosing and then it manifested!  This does not come “out of the blue”.  It comes from our vision.

We call it a miracle only because we are not aware that we created it.  Our ability to create is the energy of a miracle we all have.  We can use it to manifest consciously and on purpose.

To Succeed

  • Know what we want
  • See it clearly in your mind’s eye
  • Create a plan to get there
  • Allow a miracle, the unexpected and something to “come out of the blue”

When we have a strong vision, a sense of determination and the belief that it can happen it does.  Our vision is always manifesting (until we decide that it is not.)

We call something a miracle when we don’t recognize our part in creating it.  How can we become more capable creators when we don’t recognize our creations?  It is easy to take credit for creations that take sweat and tears, effort and exhaustion.  We are less willing to recognize our creative role when something manifests out of sheer vision and will without all the physical effort.  That is a very limited perspective on our ability to create.

Sally

One of my clients, Sally, called this morning to tell me how incredibly overjoyed she was at her success in creating exactly what she wanted professionally.   She was fully aware that she was the creator of the miracle.  It was a miracle to her because a few short months ago she could not imagine creating a career step from a well-paying high level corporate job that she hated to being a professor at the university of her choosing and in demand as a speaker that included her passion for travel.  A few months ago she had more reasons for why it could not happen.

Jeff

Sally recognized that she was creating a miracle.  So many others I know are not able to recognize or allow a miracle to happen.  They in fact try to destroy it.   One of my clients, Jeff, received a call from a new big client who asked them to work with him to connect with another company.  He had a big project in mind and heard about them.  I saw a miracle happening.  Jeff’s client could have called the other company directly.  Jeff did not see the miracle manifesting.  Instead his own fears about competition took over.  He almost destroyed a tremendous opportunity.  In the end his client wanted to contract with Jeff to subcontract the other company and oversee the project.

Miracles require that we clear our thinking so that we don’t get in the way.

Intuitive Exercise

Find quiet time each day.  Write your vision of your success.  Notice your limits and fears but disregard them. Pay attention and focus on your vision everyday.  Everyday let go of whatever competing concepts that you have.  Be determined. Take steps.

To keep it simple, it works like this.  Once you decide you want a goal, believe that you can have it (with no reason or feeling that you can’t) then your universe will automatically manifest around that goal and it will happen.  Sometimes this goes unnoticed or we take it for granted.  Others are more dramatic, bring us great validation when they happen and others we experience as sheer miracles.

Best wishes on your success,

Kay