A Bumpy Way to Success

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We are always getting our goals. This I know.  Some goals simply manifest. Other goals manifest through a rough and tumble change of circumstances. Both are ways to achieve our goals, and both are of our doing. If you have gone through a rough time and experienced loss, you probably think that I am wrong. Why would you create such chaos?

I agree that you did not create the chaos, but that disruption may be the only way for a goal that you set for yourself to manifest. Let me explain how the universe works and many of you already know this, but may have forgotten.

Whatever we imagine is being created the moment we imagine it. Sometimes, we imagine what we want, and so our universe begins to change to manifest that vision. Other times, we dwell on what we do not want, and so the universe manifests that. The warning here is to be careful what you imagine or dwell on.

It is natural to dwell on what is not working, but that is a dangerous place to focus our attention. When you find this happening, changing your attention to what you do want, produces better results in your life.  Focus on what you do want and not give a moments attention to what you do not want in your life.

When some aspect of our life is being destroyed, that can be the result of focusing on what we do not want OR focusing on what we do want. The former is obvious but how does focusing on what we do want, create so much disruption?

My question would be, is it creating what you don’t want? Or is it creating the change needed so that you can create what you do want? Change is uncomfortable. That does not mean it is a bad change. In fact, if you step back from the discomfort, you will most likely see the change forced on you, actually made space for you to create something new, something better.

Meditating or imaging the life we desire is essential to creating that life. If we do not know what we want or don’t want, then we are like a willow in the wind, being swayed one way or another by external forces. On the other hand, seeing clearly in our mind’s eye the life we desire, is the way that life is created intentionally.

Once we imagine our life, our universe begins to change from where we are to where we want to be. This is not logical, but it is very intuitive. Change begins and if we are proactive, then change flows, making decisions that lead the change.

When we are stuck in some way, resistant to change or afraid of change it is more difficult for the universe to manifest the vision of the life we desire. We are fighting change. As I mentioned at the beginning, we are always getting our goals, so something dramatic or less graceful needs to happen to get us unstuck. This is when we lose a job we have wanted out of but were afraid to change, a relationship ends that does not support us, etc.

When these changes “happen to us,” we can step back and see that it was a change that needed to happen. A change that we resisted. Because we resisted making the change on our own, it will be especially uncomfortable. This is a good time to meditate or reflect on the life we desire and reconnect with what we want for ourselves. By taking the time, to be clear we can begin to take charge of where we go from here.

Having a vision is essential but, of itself, does not create the life we desire. We must focus and take specific actions to bring that vision into our reality. Discomfort is a normal reaction to change. Resisting change intensifies this discomfort, and we are unable to move forward. Accept being uncomfortable and moving forward in a focused and determined way, moves us out of the pain and closer to the life we desire.

Remember, we are always achieving our goals, gracefully or in uncomfortable ways. We have free will. We can choose. We are always creating our reality. Hold your head high and focus on the life you desire. It is within reach.

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What Seems Impossible?​

Kayak

What seems impossible to us, may not necessarily be true.   Something that seems impossible may feel that way simply because to achieve it, makes us uncomfortable.  Moving out of our comfort zone may be the real issue we are dealing with, not the desire itself.

Our feeling that something is impossible is often a deeply ingrained belief that we created and reinforced over time making it difficult to think another way.  What if what you thought was impossible is not true?  What if you made that up at some point and stuck with it?

We can change our thinking about things even though it may not be easy.  To begin, decide that everything you believe is not true.  That everything you believe is just a thought you created.  That is, in fact, what happened.

To create something that we believe to be impossible requires our willingness to change. Are you ready to allow change and to change your thinking? Whatever you are experiencing in your world is there because you believed it.  Anything you desire that is not in your world is because you believe it is impossible. Energy builds around our thoughts and beliefs, creating layer after layer of energy reinforcing that idea.

I see this every day working with people who firmly believe that something is impossible and I see that it is not.  I experience this for myself when I worry about something that others do not. We can reflect for each other the limits that we hold. I listen to what someone says and wonder, am I seeing a limit they have created or are they showing me a limit that I have?  Usually, it is both ways.  On our own, we just sit in our thoughts, believing our own stuff!

Take a moment and image coming out of the thoughts and concepts you created about what is possible in your world.  When I say, “Nothing is impossible” what do you see, think, or feel?

Make a list of everything you believe is impossible.  Make a long list and get these thoughts out of you.

As you make this list, notice if you put energy into these beliefs, reinforce them in your mind or are beginning to separate from them.  Don’t dwell on any one idea, just make a list. Are you in the place that everything feels impossible or are you feeling as though you can change some of the ideas on this list?  Can you bring your energy out of each thought as you write it?  Begin to change your view to see things as possible.

Review your list.  Some of what you wrote, does not matter to you.  Other things that you listed, you wish you could have, be or do.  Those are the desires that matter.  Find someone to listen to you as your read your list.  Tell them you want to change your thinking about each item, that you want to see them as possible.  Your partner does not have to do anything, just listen.  As you do this, you will begin to change your perspective.  Do this often until you create enough space to take actions to allow the impossible to manifest.  Change your thinking and change what is possible.

 

Stop Making Goals

Intuitive - Clear seeingStop creating goals. That may surprise you, but I mean it. Working with those focused on success, I have learned a great deal about what creates success and what does not. One thing that is very clear to me is goals can distract us from success.

We can set goals, achieve goals and be no better off in our life than before if we lack a clear vision of the life we desire. Goals are like pieces of something though do not create anything. When we focus on achieving goals, we are thinking small no matter how big the goal.

On the other hand, when we have a clear vision for the life we desire that is big. It may sound too simple but ask yourself. If you closed your eyes and imagined the life you desire, would be able to imagine it? Give it a try. Notice the thoughts and reactions you have as you imagine in your mind’s eye. Doing this exercise regularly until you can see your vision clearly and can imagine it happening is important for your life to manifest.

Without a clear vision, we are experiencing whatever comes our way day to day without leading our vision. The first step is spending time meditating on or envisioning the life you desire. Do this often. Get good at it then simply take actions every day toward that vision. Make new choices. Get out of old routines. Realize how you and your life need to change for this vision to manifest and begin to make and allow those changes. It’s that simple except it is not easy to imagine the life we desire, to imagine it happening then changing our focus and actions every day to step into and create the life imagined.

Give it a try. Stop creating goals. Take actions toward your vision and experience a miracle.

Best wishes, Kay

Don’t Seek Comfort To Achieve

200469160-001When people are in discomfort or pain, it is my inclination to want to bring them out of it.  I want to raise their energy high enough to feel better, so I feel better.  Not a good way to be.  It gets in the way of success and achieving our vision.

We create discomfort to stop, reflect and see where we want to be versus where we are. The problem is our tendency to seek comfort.  Seeking comfort can prevent us from achieving our vision.  It is in our nature to get out of discomfort quickly as possible.  Everyone does this a different way, i.e. getting an endorphin/physical rush, healing or massage, drinking, drugs, sex, and anything else that changes the energy we are experiencing.

Growth Periods

Nothing changes except that we are out of pain for that moment. The discomfort will return because there was something we needed to change and still do. To give this experience a label, I call it a growth period, a point in time when we have the opportunity for real change.  The decision we make can change everything.  We can choose to get out of the pain, or we can decide to sit with it to find out something about ourselves and our vision.

Growth periods happen when we have a vision of something that we want in our lives.  Once we have a vision, the universe starts to manifest around that mental image picture and things start to change. How quickly things change depends on what we allow.

When the universe starts to manifest around our vision and things start to change, we experience discomfort. Our body reacts to every change with unease until we get used to and comfortable with the new energy and space the change created.  It is at this point that we can decide. We can decide to sit with the discomfort and understand the change being created so that our vision can manifest OR we can do whatever we can to get out of discomfort.  Each choice produces a different result.  Allowing and understanding the pain allows our vision to continue to manifest.  Resisting and trying to get out of it causes the change we started to stop.

Choices

When I get into a growth period, I am honestly inclined to either of these choices depending on how intense the discomfort is.   The greater the discomfort, the bigger the change you are in the process of creating.  We can stop that change or we can allow it so when in a growth period, I ask myself, “What part of my vision is creating this growth period?  Where do I need to change to allow this aspect of my vision to manifest?” With this awareness, you decide, “Do I want this change in my life?”  Honestly, you can say,  “This growth period ‘s too big, I am going to give up this aspect of my vision.”  Or you can say, “I am willing to understand this growth period so that my vision can manifest.”

Your Vision

It helps to read your vision to align yourself with it.  If you do not have a written vision, then I suggest you write one.  A written vision helps ground your plan, to understand the changes you are experiencing so that you know they are not coincidences.  Most importantly, none of this reflection or understanding is logical.  Your understanding is most clear from an intuitive perspective.  Meditate.  Imagine, visualize, see in your mind’s eye your vision.  While in meditation, ask yourself within, “What change is this growth period creating and why is it so uncomfortable?”  Try not to think rather listen to yourself at your core.  The answers you hear will enlighten you and your journey to the vision of the life you desire.

Your Vision is Not Out There

Frangipani Spa Flowers reflected water.PlumeriaThe importance of having a vision is promoted everywhere these days. Having a vision sounds like a discovery, or maybe we are hearing it for the first time. Perhaps the ability to see in our mind’s eye – to visualize -is gathering acceptance. In any case, the idea of vision is not new and is it not something someone discovered.

Our vision is within us. Contrary to that perspective, people believe we have to figure out or decide our vision. That would be an incorrect approach. Our vision is at our core and always has been.

Working with professionals and business owners has increased my awareness of how a vision develops. Over the years I discovered that our vision is not something that we decide. Our vision is something that we discover within us, at our core.

When we can come out of our thinking, stop analyzing and arguing the pros and cons of various vision options, perhaps we can get quiet enough to listen to ourselves. Learning to go within and communicate with ourselves at our core, will give us the insight we need to know the vision that is already within us.

Our life is the path we follow to let our vision unfold and manifest. Our path is not about what we do but an expression of who we are at our core. I know this makes us shift our thinking that our vision, path and purpose are things we have to decide and create out there in the world somehow. A different perspective sees our vision flow from within to manifest in our world.

Our path is to experience our vision. We get off our path, get in our way and force ourselves, often with a lot of effort, to create what we think we should. Alternatively, if we simply quiet our space, go within and listen to ourselves at our core, we can begin to live the life our vision inspires.

Creating from our core is not logical. Then again we think too much. Our thinking gets in the way of knowing the vision we have always had for ourselves and our path to experience our that vision in the world. Do not think about this. That’s what gets us off our path.

Thoughts, concepts, emotions and programming that we hold get in the way of knowing our vision and expressing it.

Find the vision you have always had within you. First, stop thinking. Get quiet. Close your eyes. Go within. Get to know who you are at your core. Do not think. Learn to listen. Follow your heart. Follow your core, and you will be on your path, allowing the vision you always had within you to manifest.

Kay

The Tough Steps

fresh sunrise at mountainCreating the life that we desire takes courage. Working with people every day shows me a great deal about how we create.  Everyone has a vision of the life they desire and goals to get there.  Most take small steps and never fully achieve their dream.  Why is that?

We decide it is too hard, change is too uncomfortable, we are afraid or don’t like taking risks.  In a nutshell, we don’t take big enough steps to create our vision.  We prefer the comfort of what is familiar even if it is not where we want to be.

My job as a coach is to push you to go where you say you want to go.  Lindsay owns a business.  She works hard but wants more.  Lindsay wants her business to run without her so that she can have a life as well.  The solution involves a handful of key changes, and she would be well on her way to having a business running reliably just the way she wants without her being there all the time.

The vision Lindsay has for herself, and her business will stay a vision because she does not like working on business development areas that are new to her, to think in new ways and to be uncertain.  All this makes her uncomfortable, so she says, “I am not ready for this today.”

Carol is a career professional and successful at a job she does not like.  More importantly, she wants time to create a relationship so that her life is whole from her perspective. Having a job that pays her well is more comfortable than the effort of looking for a new position that pays well and that she enjoys.  Carol also finds it hard to get out of her routine and spend time meeting people. Until she is ready to take steps that are uncomfortable, her vision stays something she desires.

We are creatures of routine even if those routines do not serve our vision of the life we desire.  It takes determination, the courage to change and the will to take action to move from where we are now to have what we say we want.

Take a deep breath.  Write down what you want in your life.  Then write the steps you can take that will make a difference.  Do not write down the easy steps because you are going to do those anyway.  The difficult steps are the ones we need to take to make a difference in our lives. Have courage.

Kay

Coaching

Success is not a mystery.

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Success is not a mystery.

What I know about success.

The clearer our vision, the greater our success.

So spend more time dreaming and not all your time doing.

Focus time on actions that create success.

Do not be distracted by time thiefs.

Create a plan and act on it diligently.

Decide how you want to be in your life, work and relationships with others then be that.

Know how you are being in each moment.

Believe in your vision. Believe in yourself.

Create success with the support of others. Never do it alone.

See your vision manifesting now, not in the future.

Allow it to be uncomfortable. Change is uncomfortable.

Have enthusiasm for your vision of success. Stay focused on that.

Don’t give up on vision, yourself or others.