Don’t Seek Comfort To Achieve

200469160-001When people are in discomfort or pain, it is my inclination to want to bring them out of it.  I want to raise their energy high enough to feel better, so I feel better.  Not a good way to be.  It gets in the way of success and achieving our vision.

We create discomfort to stop, reflect and see where we want to be versus where we are. The problem is our tendency to seek comfort.  Seeking comfort can prevent us from achieving our vision.  It is in our nature to get out of discomfort quickly as possible.  Everyone does this a different way, i.e. getting an endorphin/physical rush, healing or massage, drinking, drugs, sex, and anything else that changes the energy we are experiencing.

Growth Periods

Nothing changes except that we are out of pain for that moment. The discomfort will return because there was something we needed to change and still do. To give this experience a label, I call it a growth period, a point in time when we have the opportunity for real change.  The decision we make can change everything.  We can choose to get out of the pain, or we can decide to sit with it to find out something about ourselves and our vision.

Growth periods happen when we have a vision of something that we want in our lives.  Once we have a vision, the universe starts to manifest around that mental image picture and things start to change. How quickly things change depends on what we allow.

When the universe starts to manifest around our vision and things start to change, we experience discomfort. Our body reacts to every change with unease until we get used to and comfortable with the new energy and space the change created.  It is at this point that we can decide. We can decide to sit with the discomfort and understand the change being created so that our vision can manifest OR we can do whatever we can to get out of discomfort.  Each choice produces a different result.  Allowing and understanding the pain allows our vision to continue to manifest.  Resisting and trying to get out of it causes the change we started to stop.

Choices

When I get into a growth period, I am honestly inclined to either of these choices depending on how intense the discomfort is.   The greater the discomfort, the bigger the change you are in the process of creating.  We can stop that change or we can allow it so when in a growth period, I ask myself, “What part of my vision is creating this growth period?  Where do I need to change to allow this aspect of my vision to manifest?” With this awareness, you decide, “Do I want this change in my life?”  Honestly, you can say,  “This growth period ‘s too big, I am going to give up this aspect of my vision.”  Or you can say, “I am willing to understand this growth period so that my vision can manifest.”

Your Vision

It helps to read your vision to align yourself with it.  If you do not have a written vision, then I suggest you write one.  A written vision helps ground your plan, to understand the changes you are experiencing so that you know they are not coincidences.  Most importantly, none of this reflection or understanding is logical.  Your understanding is most clear from an intuitive perspective.  Meditate.  Imagine, visualize, see in your mind’s eye your vision.  While in meditation, ask yourself within, “What change is this growth period creating and why is it so uncomfortable?”  Try not to think rather listen to yourself at your core.  The answers you hear will enlighten you and your journey to the vision of the life you desire.

Energy In Your Space Is Real

dreamstime_man-meditating_5645730During each day, we pick up energy from people, places and things. If we hold these energies in our space, it becomes part of us, influencing and controlling our space. We act and react differently as a result. Knowing that energy is real and that we can manage energy is an important step in self-awareness, wellness and success. Meditation is a way to manage energy.

Energy That Is Not Ours  

It does not matter if the energy we picked up is energy from something we enjoyed or something we resisted. Other’s energy in our space alters us. If it was a positive energy at first, over time the energy level drops and it becomes just another energy in our space. We can feel stressed, resistance, anger or effort. We begin to feel and act differently because we are managing energy that is not ours. This is overwhelming. Sarah told me she comes home from work and sits in front of the television for hours until she feels better. In this instance, Sarah, did not clear the energy of her day. The energy is still in her space, just not vibrating at a high pitch anymore and she has accepted it. I taught Sarah how to spend a few minutes in meditation to clear the energy of her day with a better result.

The first step in energy management is to clear our space each day. Others deal with energy in their space in different ways. Some self-medicate to numb themselves from the energy in their space. Some explode or rage to force the energy out of their space. Others do intense physical workouts or get lost in something to distract them. There are many more ways to hide from the discomfort of others energy in our space. Meditation is a better way.

Energy Depleted
Likewise, we leave our energy outside ourselves, at our work, in a conversation, a place we went and the list is endless. If we continue to leave our energy places, we become depleted, feel burned out and are resentful. When our energy is not high enough, we cannot create and our creations begin to dissolve. Our wellness is affected. Sarah learned that she gives her energy away, has a difficult time letting go of experiences and feels exhausted most of the time. In our session, I taught Sarah the second step in energy management, to gather up her energy from her day. Gathering up your energy is not logical, but it is very intuitive.

Energy Is Real

The first step is to know that energy is real even if we are not conscious of it in this way. Meditation is important as a way to manage energy.  Create a time to stop each day for energy management, to clear our space of any energy we picked up and to collect up our energy that we may have left somewhere or with someone. Whatever comes to mind during meditation shows you where your energy is or what energy is in your space. Energy is real. Energy management is only one but an important aspect of meditation.

Make time each day to get quiet, focus on yourself, release and let go of whatever is in your space or on your mind. You can feel it, hear it and know it. Then imagine calling your attention and energy back from whatever is on your mind or is distracting you. Continue until you feel like you and are fully focused on yourself in present time.

Best wishes on your success, Kay

Meditation

Don’t think. Meditate.

dreamstime_man-meditating_5645730To meditate is trendy. Parade Magazine’s recent cover story states “Everyone is doing it” then mentioned the rich and famous that claim meditation is part of their daily routine. I hope that is the case because I agree. I cannot imagine not meditating, taking time to spot, set quiet, clear my thinking and get back on track. Meditation can be a life saver.

As a business coach and consultant, I urge all my clients to meditate and most do. I teach meditation, a style evolved from many forms of meditation, to business owners and professionals with success in mind. It does not matter what form of meditation you use as long as you take the time to stop, get quiet, go within and stop thinking!

Stand. Sit. Walk.

Most people sit for meditation. Some do a walking meditation. While I mostly sit, feet on the floor, when particularly energized and I cannot quiet my body enough to sit, I will do a Tai Chi standing meditation called wuji.

Tried to Meditate

The most common response I hear to my suggestion to meditate is “I’ve tried that.” Meditation takes practice. We are busy and always doing something. We think all the time. It is hard to stop. When we learn to stop, calm and quiet the body and clear our thinking, we finally begin to listen to ourselves.

Listening

We almost never listen to ourselves, which causes us to make poor decisions, head in the wrong direction or not change directions when we need to. Meditation helps us in body, mind and spirit. It clears our mind, connects us with ourselves and promotes wellness. Who does not want that?

Be Determined

Meditation takes practice, persistence and determination to get started. We have to change old patterns, routines and habits just to create the time to stop, sit down, close our eyes, take a deep breath and get quiet. It is an effort that is well worth it.

You Decide When & Where

The known benefits of meditation mean nothing compared to each person’s experience when they established a meditation practice whether it is five minutes, half-hour or hour each day. It does not matter if you do it in the morning, at lunch break or in the evening. You can find where meditation fits in your life and why you are doing it. I prefer the morning so that I start my day clear. Others prefer evening so that they can clear from their day. Some do both. I meditate before each client appointment so that I am clear and present.

I read about a successful entrepreneur who stopped every hour for one minute to meditate to make sure his thinking was clear. Everyone in his office knew this routine and honored it.

Start

Once you start your practice, you will find how you want to use meditation to achieve your goals, personally and professionally. If I were to say one important thing about meditation, it would be to stop thinking.  Do not think during meditation. Just be present with yourself. Clear your thinking. Your next experience will be remarkable.

Let me know how I can help you establish your meditation practice. Meditation changes everything.

Best wishes, Kay

About Meditation

What Do You Avoid?

dreamstimefree_214026Procrastination is a term often used and not taken very seriously. Sure, we all procrastinate. If we look deeper and ask, “What am I avoiding?” that stimulates a different level of energy and avoidance.

What we avoid gets in our way.   We can work hard to be successful, experiencing little progress. We can do all the right things and still not meet our goals. The answer may lie in what we avoid.

Before you start the New Year take a moment to get quiet, go within, meditate and reflect on what you avoid?

  • What decisions do I avoid?
  • What communications am I avoiding?
  • What changes am I putting off?
  • What actions am I avoiding taking?

There may be other questions that will help you uncover what you are avoiding and resisting.   Without thinking, trust your intuition and ask why. Why am I avoiding this? Then take a deep breath and release all the energy you have generated in your space in avoidance and resistance. Continue to let go of the energy you feel in your space until the resistance is gone.

 

Try this simple exercise.  It can change everything.

 

Best wishes on your success in the New Year, Kay

Vision From Your Core

Manifesting
Manifesting

Every year around this time we reflect on where we have been, create a vision of what’s next and a plan to get there. It is so easy for our vision to be too narrow, focusing on one goal or another and not the bigger picture of the life we desire personally and professionally.

We create professional goals separate from our personal goals.   There may be a disconnect that we do not notice from the logic of our mind.

Seeing that bigger picture is possible when we gain some distance about where are now. From an intuitive perspective this means literally to pull our energy and attention out of our current creations, successes, failures, problems, accomplishments, what we enjoy and what we do not.

When we can create separation or distance from everything that is we gain perspective and can see more clearly. There is one more step. Look at the vision for your life from who you are at your core. Being at your core happens easiest in meditation. Go within. Find a communication with yourself. In this way you can listen to your heart, your soul and yourself, asking where you truly want to be in your life. What is next?

Our lives are so noisy that we cannot hear ourselves. Focus is typically on something or someone so much so that we lose our ability to hear ourselves. We act and react to whatever is in our space at the moment. Reacting without thought reminds me of the adage that says we are like a couch. We wear the impression of the last person who sat on us. In order to know our truth about what is next we have to clear everyone and everything from our space. The goal is to be alone with our self, long enough to get back into communication with who we are at our core. Once there, we can ask questions about what is next.

Being able to hear our self is not easy. We have noise in our heads. We tend to think more than we listen. When we take time to be alone, quiet our body, clear our thinking, go within and ask a question about what’s is next, we can find our truth. The key is not to think but to listen. Listening to ourselves at our core takes practice. We are so programmed to think that we tend to do that automatically though the answer you are looking for comes in listening to yourself and the God of your heart at your core.

Before you create your goals and plans for the New Year, take the time to be alone, go within and communicate with yourself. What is your next step? Don’t ask the world. Ask from who you are at your core.

Best wishes for peaceful, happy and prosperous New Year, Kay

Lost in Anger or Any Other Emotion

hHow can we stay on track, stay healthy, feel clear and focused on creating personally and professionally?  Meditation makes us stop and pay attention to how we are doing and how we are at that moment.   We are the effect of so much, hold experiences in our space and mostly we don’t realize what we are being and that we can change.

Claire

Claire and I went to a long walk, something we do periodically.  From the onset, I could feel Claire’s anger.  She had nothing good to say about anything, and we had walked only five minutes.  I knew Claire was the effect of some energy in her space, so I intuitively asked, “How is work?”  With that the tirade came out, a long story of frustration with a local hospital as she tried desperately to get services for her client.  I listened and watched the anger in her space.  She was running the anger but not releasing it, which is sometimes the case when people tell the story.

 Energy In Her Space

Finally, I said, “So that is all the anger in your space?” Claire stopped.  Looked at me surprised.  She did not realize that she was running so much anger. When was the last time she meditated?  Claire admitted she had gotten out of the habit of meditating.  I then asked her when this episode occurred with the hospital.  Six weeks ago was her reply.  She had held that anger all that time, affecting all her communications with everyone.  Claire had no idea.  I asked how her husband was, “Oh he is too grumpy these days!”  Was he too being the effect of the anger in her space?   Whatever energy we hold creates our experiences, impacts our reality.  This alone is a great reason to meditate daily, to clear our space of whatever is rubbing us the wrong way before it creates more of what we do not want.

 Holding On

I walked with Claire two days later.   She was still angry and complaining.  I laughed and asked her if she had meditated to clear her anger toward the hospital?  No, she had not.  Hm.  What is even more interesting is Claire was so stuck on her anger at the hospital that it distracted her from her original goal of getting services for her client.  She had lost her perspective.

Meditate

This happens to all of us.  An experience and the energy it stimulates in us can take over our space.  When this happens, we lose our perspective and have a narrow vision.  Everything after that is seen through the energy the experience stimulated in us.  Meditation is a way to get out of that energy, to see what we are being, to clear and get our space back.  Sound familiar?

Take the time to meditate. It makes all the difference.

Kay

 

 

Missing Opportunities We Cannot See

Moments of a lifeI cannot tell you the number of times I have seen people miss enormous opportunities. They just cannot see it. As a coach for business owners and professionals focused on success, this is frustrating.

Elaine

Elaine is a communications expert who has held many impressive positions, knows persons of influence. She has connections so why can she not achieve her one dream to have a TV show in which she features and interviews incredibly interesting people. Elaine loves people. She has an amazing ability to bring them out which why she knows so many.

My work with Elaine is to work with her to create her interview show. She seems so close to realizing this dream. At present, she is working as a consultant so she has ability to decide how to spend her time. Recently the owner of a small communications firm asked her to take over his company for three months while he took a break. Was she interested? Elaine agreed though running a business was not her skill set, so she wondered how this opportunity came her way. Elaine is a firm believer in creating a vision knowing that vision is always manifesting so how did this fit?

After she agreed Fred told her that, by the way, he also had a weekly TV show in which he interviews people so would she do that as well. Elaine became very uncertain, afraid, did not feel competent and wondered how she could bow out of this piece of the company.

Suddenly Elaine was unaware of her dream to do interviews on TV. It was as if part of her mind went blank!

Lori

Lori runs a growing company opening her third office this year. We have been working on growing her business so that it can run without her. Not that she intends to step out at this time, but strong systems are important for any growing company. The company relies too much on her and with the growth of staff things are getting a bit out of control. Lori was determined to fix this. One of her strategies was to create a practice management system that everyone could use to manage their time, their work, improve billing and more. Lori and her COO spend hours researching the options, bought one that turned out not to work for them so then purchased another system at signification cost. She and her staff invested hundreds of hours in setting, customizing and training. When they launched the system the expected period of transition from the old way of doing things to the new created some set backs.

I observed Lori placing her attention elsewhere as did her COO. It was as if the PMS did not exist. It was as if that part of her mind forgot about her vision, the investment and value to her business. She went back to her old ways.

Why Do We Miss Opportunities?

I could give many other examples of situations when we created a vision of what we want to happen; it begins to manifest, and we don’t see it. Why is that? From an intuitive perspective, there are many aspects. For one, we don’t have enough space to see clearly. When we have a lot of energies, people and concepts in our space demanding one thing or another we cannot see more than six inches in front of ourselves.

Secondly, when we create a vision we are creating something new, and it will require a change. Change is most often uncomfortable. It is in our nature to seek comfort so we back away. As we back away from discomfort in the process, we are also backing away from our vision. We cannot see that happening because we do not have enough space. We have lost our awareness.

What Can We Do?

So how do we not miss opportunities? It begins with being conscious, aware and clear. Taking the time each day to meditate, clear our space and refocus on what we intend to create is foremost. Without clarity, we lose our way, our direction and just work hard.

Next, notice how determined you are to achieve your vision. Some aspects of our vision require more determination (energy commitment) than others. How determined are you?

Finally, be in present time. Being present is the only way you can see in the moment what is before you. When we are not present, we are on automatic pilot doing what we always do.

Our vision and its opportunities are always right in front of us. Always. The goal is to be able to see them and take the opportunities.

Best wishes on your success, Kay