Lost A Client to His Passion

????????????????????????????????????????A fellow business coach lost a client after their first session, and it was wonderful! Sam told the story of his first meeting with Fred. Sam felt Fred’s natural warmth and experienced his transparency refreshing. Sam found he had to ask Fred often to speak up, due to his softly spoken manner. Sam could feel Fred’s pain and anxiety when he opened up about his frustrations, based on his crippling fear of expressing himself with his team. Fred has built two profitable businesses. Fred’s been offered the worldwide rights to the brand to one of his businesses and wanted to franchise. Fred admitted he had no idea how to become bigger than his fear, step out of his softly spoken shadow, and grow into an inspirational and respected leader.

Sam and I begin coaching our clients, in the same way. We want to know what they value, what is important to them and how they view their purpose. It is a challenging exercise for everyone and essential for coaching to begin. Who they are at their core shows up in their business and their life.

After this exercise, Fred decided to stop running his business. His passion was to support the teachers in his company. He decided to take paid position allowing him to pass the running of the business over to someone else as an outright sale or a management arrangement. Fred’s first coaching session with Sam allowed him to find what he wanted and what he did not want–“I do not want to be stuck in front of endless Excel spreadsheets.”

Fred is no longer Sam’s client as he stepped out of being a business owner. From Sam’s perspective, his one coaching session with Fred was a complete success. Fred found his passion. Fred took the time to stop and look at where he was and if that aligned with who he was. Fred found himself in the midst of all of that and decided to follow his passion.  This is his version of success.


New Culture of Business


A new culture of business is emerging voicing a new set of values, increased self-awareness and businesses with a new definition of success. I am so relieved by the changes appearing in how businesses run, interact, view their staff, vendors and community. Some of the changes are subtle and others not so subtle. In the end, we are moving to a more moral, value based and healthy way to do business. Not everyone is on board with this, but more and more of us are. “Never underestimate the power of a small group of committed people to change the world. In fact, it is the only thing that ever has.” (Margaret Mead)

Here are some differences I see between the old business paradigm and the new.

Old: Be on top. Beat out the competition. Be better than everyone else. Take out the competition. Get the largest share of the market.

New: Be the best you can be. Do the best we can. Build our brand so that people know how we are different. Attract loyal customers who value our brand. Collaborate with other businesses. Share resources.

Old: Get more sales – at any cost. Over promise if necessary. Get the sale. Get more than the next guy.

New: Create customers. Under promise and over deliver. Not everyone is our customer. Don’t sell. Understand our customer and serve them with unbeatable quality.

Old: Money flows to the top. Hierarchy with command and control management.

New: Collaboration. Everyone valued. Share the success. Everyone seen as contributing to the success.

Old: Environmental concerns are ok, but not if it affects the bottom line. The community is important if it is a customer.

New: Prevent impacts on the environment and be profitable. Be part of the community. Give back. Join the sharing economy.

Old: How much money can we make?

New: Create a business that serves everyone’s life, that people enjoy working in, and that has value whether it sells widgets to solar power.


What changes can you add to this list? This is just the beginning. In what new ways do you or your company operate? Join the conversation.

Be Careful What You Choose

Cloud SmileysI just have to ask, “What do you choose?”   Every day I watch business owners and professionals make really great choices and others make the worst choice possible but they do not see it.  Of course, they do not see it.  Who would deliberately make a really bad choice yet it happens all the time.  So today I ask you to look deeper at what is behind choice for you.

Making choices is the most powerful creative act we perform each day.  The choices we make create our reality (spiritually and physically)and yet we often do this with so little regard.  What do you choose to have in your life?  The energy behind our choices is important in understanding the experiences we are creating.  Do we make choices from fear, resistance, anger, etc.?  Wow!  It will manifest from there.  On the other hand do we make choices from enthusiasm, compassion, love, excitement, validation?  If so, it will manifest in that way.

We make choices all day long.   Some are automatic responses made without a second thought.  We might also chose based on the collective consciousness – go with the flow.  Finally, you could choose from your inner awareness of the choices before you and make your highest choice which is not always the easy one.

Making choices to control something never turns out well because we know we do not have control – ever.   We can make choices that set forth how we want to be in relation to someone or somethingbut controlling it is never a reality.

I work with business owners and professionals every day.  Some take responsibility for their choices, understand what is behind them and learn about the impact of the choices they make.  Others do not want to know, to be conscious of themselves or take responsibility for the result of the choices they make everyday.  They just decide and move on.  How well someone understands themselves and what drives their choices is reflected in their personal and professional success.  No one to blame.

There is much to be learned by understanding ourselves and what is driving one choice or another, hopefully before we make it.   The choice itself does not matter nearly as much as the thoughts, pictures, concepts, emotions and energy that is behind it.  Why do you want to make that choice?  What is behind it emotionally, conceptually, etc.?  You have heard, “Be careful what you pray for” or “Be careful what you believe”.  I would say even before that “Be careful what you choose”.

Your first choice here is whether to be aware of what is behind your choices.  This is an important choice.  What is behind this particular choice for you? To know yourself or not to know yourself.  The greatest step we can take to achieve our vision is to stop acting and reacting to everyone and everything but to choose how to be.  This is a choice to be conscious and aware of what we choose in each moment.  This means to be present, conscious and aware of self.

If something is not as you would like it to be – do not judge it.  Take a moment and remember the choice you made that brought you here.  If you do not have something perhaps it is because you have not yet chosen to have itor  you  inadvertently chose not to have it.   For example,  saying that you want something then thinking that it cannot happen is a choice not to have it.

Let’s assume you are someone who understands that the choices you make create  you experiences.  Let’s assume that you are willing to see and know what is behind your choices (fear, grief, anger, envy, control, love, enthusiasm, creativity, etc.).  Once you know thatanswer then make the highest and grandest choice even if it is at first uncomfortable.

All the choices we make come from the body, mind and spirit.  The best choices use all three.  From who you are as a spirit come your highest choices, your grandest vision of who you are and chose to be.  What is more common is for the body to want one thing, the mind to think another way and for you to know intuitively your highest choice.   What do you choose?  When we are aligned in body, mind and spirit our choices create results that will amaze.

Take time to stop and be aware of what is behind the choice you are making in each moment.  Make your highest and grandest choice then see what happens.

Best wishes on your success,


How might the world be different if …..

dreamstimefree_33939Working with business owners and professionals focused on success is inspiring.  My work with clients begins with knowing what is important to them and what they value.  This is their compass for the success they are creating. Over the years I have read hundreds of values statements written by my clients and I continue to be inspired by them.

Not surprising these men and women share some values in common and it makes me wonder.  How might the world be different if their values were shared by more people?  I am not so naïve  to expect that everyone can share these values but how might the world be different if more of us did?

How might the world be different if ….

  • More people cared.

No one lied.

  • We shared more.

Were angry less.

  • We showed more love.

We set aside our ego.

  • Started with having peace in our home.
  • Were at peace with everyone around us.
  • Had compassion.
  • Took responsibility for our effect on others.

Helped each other.

How might the world be different?


What would you add to this?


Best wishes,  Kay

Business Coach


Just Be

dreamstime_xs_19899077 Inspired success begins with you though it is possible to be successful without this awareness but it is a different experience.   If you look at successful people it is easy to see those who create inspired success and those who are simply successful.  Their lives are quite different.

In this blog I focus on inspired success.  You are probably tired of hearing about self-awareness.  It is a tired term but there is no way around it.  If you are waiting for inspired success, hoping for it or even visualizing it you are going to be waiting a long time.  It is not out there somewhere. Inspired success begins  with awareness of yourself and where you are coming from.  Who are you?  What is important to you?  What do you value?  How do you want your life to be?  This awareness changes the energy in your space.  You experience yourself and others experience you differently.

Your life, business, work, relationships, career are a form of self-expression.  You are creating in a physical form some aspect of yourself.   When we do this consciously we are pleased with what we have in our lives.   When we are not conscious and aware of ourselves and what we are creating then stuff just happens.  Some of it we like and some we do not. When we are not creating from our core then we are just working and what we are working on is more important than who we are.

Inspired success depends on awareness of self, not what you should do, what others think of you, what comes along or even what your ego dictates.   The easiest way to become aware of self is through meditation.   I suggest a simple form of meditation designed to help you quiet your body and stop thinking so that you can simply become more aware of you.

The work, career or business we create comes from this awareness.  The more aware we are the more clearly we are able to create what we enjoy and what serves us.  Have you thought about your career or your business being a reflection of you, your energy, your thoughts, emotions and programming?  This discovery of yourself takes time, does not have an end point and it creates our reality.  I know this is not logical but it is very intuitive. Knowing what is important to you is essential as you decide what you want to create or change and what you are creating so that it supports what is important to you.


I was working with Tom,  a successful business owner, who decided his business was running him and felt like he lost his life in the process.   When he meditated on this he decided that his relationship with his wife was most important to him that while creating a successful business he had compromised their time together.  When I pointed out that he chose to create it that way and that is not the way it needed to be, he was curious.  From that point he decided to create his success around what was important to him and to his surprise it worked.

One day lost in his enthusiasm he decided to open an office in Hong Kong.  This was an old dream that was now possible.  He talked about taking the lead to get this office started.  I asked him if this decision fit what was important to him and what he valued.  If he was in Hong Kong how would that support his relationship with his wife.  Upon reflection he did open the Hong Kong office but hired a young executive who was eager to live there.  Together they built this division – Tom from here and his new executive in Hong Kong.

Once we know what is important to use then we create our success in a way that supports this.


The next step is to know what you value.  This may seem like the same question as what is important to you but upon reflection you will find similarities and differences.  Your values go with you to your work, your business, your life and it makes everything feel right, aligned and in sync.   Your values are not only concepts that you hold they also vibrate an energy in your space that others experience.   This may not be logical but it is something you can experience.

Your values become part of your business, your staff and customers are drawn to you because they share those values and so it goes with everyone in your life personally and professionally.  Knowing what you value is another level of knowing yourself.  Meditation is a way to find a quiet place to reflect on what you value.

We grow in our understanding of our values over time.  Our value change as we have life experiences and learn more about ourselves.  When we stick by our values then it guides the choices that we make so that we are always true to who we are.  In this way we feel connected to our work and our business.  There is no disconnect or dissatisfaction.  We find opportunities that fit what we value and decline opportunities that do not.  We make decisions that move us in ways that support what we value.

So where are you now?

Does your work or business align to what you value?  If they do then you are on track to create your vision of inspired success.  If that is not the case then you have choices.   You can change how you are in your work or your business so that you are being what you value.  You can change what you are doing and create a new opportunity.   It is common for us to decide that the problem is outside of us.  That we have to quit what we are doing. That there is something wrong with someone else and that is the cause of our dissatisfaction.  That is not the case. That is never the case.  Inspired success begins with us knowing who we are, what is important and what we value.   Walking, talking and being this creates a reality that works for us.  So the change comes within us.  No need to jump ship just yet because if you don’t change you then nothing changes no matter where you go the pattern repeats itself in a new place.


Kathy is an experienced capable professional strategist but feels her life is not what she wants it to be personally or professionally.  When I asked her what was important to her or what did she value she did not know the answers.  In fact she did not know what she wanted.  This is not uncommon.  We take what comes at us which is one way of experiencing yourself.  We may like or not like what comes your way.

Take the time to meditate.  Connect with who you are, what is important to you and what you value then be that everyday and everywhere.  See how things change and how you experience your life and your work.

Best wishes on your success,


Write It Down and Change Your World

h  A good way to start the new year is with a clear perspective. The first step is to know what is important to you and what you value.  Take some time with this.  You probably have your top three right off the top of your head but there is more to it.

Coaching with my clients begins with them writing down what is important to them and what they value.  The reaction is the same from everyone.  Taking the time to do this is very grounding and helps them focus.  I suggest they write their first thoughts then come back and look at it again preferably in a quiet place where they can clear their thinking, quiet their body and listen within.


This process creates many ahas!   One woman, Carmen, thought her family was most important to her but when she really looked at it money was most important because of financial uncertainty.  In terms of her values her family was first but money was most important at this point in time.  There is nothing to judge here and there are no right answers.  What is important is that we know and acknowledge what is important to us and what we value.  Some of  this is based on circumstances and so it changes.  Some of it reflects who we are at our core and that does not change.

Once we know this then every action we take and decision we make needs to support this otherwise we get off track.  This happens all the time.   Part of my role is to help you stay aligned to who you are, what is important to you and what you value.


This week I was meeting with a business owner excited to expand his company, an expansion that would make his role more global.  I asked Rick to go back and read what he wrote about what was important to him and what he valued.  In both, family and spending time with family was first.   He sat back and reflected on how he could still grow his company globally and not take him away from his family.   His solution was to let go of control, to trust his top executive team and to hire a VP of Global Sales.  This sounds easy but it was hard for Rick because he is a hands on person.  His impulse is to get involved but his first value was his family and still is.  So for him sticking with his values is important but in this case not easy.


A professional woman stated that the most important thing to her was to have a loving and supportive relationship with her sons and her husband.  These holidays challenged those values.  Kathy was frustrated because she wanted to attend a number of holiday parties.  Her husband and sons did not.  They wanted to stay home and have a family holiday. Kathy was angry, feeling like she cannot get what she wants, etc.  Her resentment and  judgment of her husband and sons were foremost in her mind.  When she reread what was important to her and what she valued she was taken back.  Things were not very loving and supportive at this moment. Kathy decided she had to engage her family in an agreement to attend one or more of the parties in a loving and supportive way or she had to let the parties go.  This was not easy because she was feeling as though she was not getting what she wanted.  I suggested that  after the holidays she go back to what she wrote about  what was important to her and what she valued to make sure the list is complete and that it reflects who she is at her core.  Professional and social pressures often cause us to loose our perspective.

Write It Down & Change Your World

There were many more stories from this week about where we move away from what is important to us and what we value.   If you do not have this written down for yourself I suggest you take the time.  It will change everything and  will set the course for the new year.  If you have written what is important to you and what you value, read it over.  It does change so make sure it is true for you in present time.   Keep this in your view.  Read it often.   When you have a tough decision to make or things seem out of sorts so back and read your list before you make a decision or take an action.  It will help you stay on track and will support your vision of success.

Best wishes on your success,